I realise that everyone with a working Internet connection or access to broadband probably knows this already, but this is interesting news people! L.A. punk rockers, The Bronx have a new track up on their myspace entitled ‘Knifeman’ and it can be downloaded as a lovely low-quality encoded mp3. Yeah!

Rocket From The Crypt fans will be pleased to hear the ‘Bring Us Bullets’ riff being used like a cheap whore on a Saturday night, whilst current Bronx fans will greet Matt Caughthran’s trademark vocal yelp like an old friend.

 ‘Knifeman’ will feature on the band’s new record, (self-titled of course) which is out September this year. They’re also working on a ‘Mariachi El Bronx’ album, which will probably be out at the same time. A video of them playing a Mariachi track live is on their myspace. Also, two new members have been added to the ‘El Bronx’ side, notably Brad Magers on trumpet and Vincent Hidalgo from The Drips.

The band is currently on the Vans Warped Tour, making them the first punk band to ever play there (Oooooh BURN!) and several dates in August around the U.S.

-

Links

The Bronx
El Bronx
Official Site
The Drips
White Drugs

-

By Ross Macdonald

Cover songs are always a mixed bag. There’s nothing like hearing your favourite band belting out their rendition of a famous song and thinking “wow, they made that their own, good job!” Only to have some die-hard fan of said song come round your house and beat you with a big sign that says “you’re wrong and a total pillock” until you recant the previous statement.

Anyway, here are some covers of well-known(ish) songs that have been reinterpreted by other bands closely linked with the hardcore genre. Think of this as the successor to the ‘Depression’s Got A Hold Of Me’ article that I wrote many moons ago. Enjoy.

-

Throwdown - Baby Got Back (original by Sir Mix-a-lot)

As covers go, this can go both ways. One opinion is ‘dear god, this is worse than finding out you’re grandfather was Hitler’ or ‘I’m sorry, I can’t form a coherent decision on this track as I’m too busy vomiting my lungs up with laughter.’ Throwdown know the score, keeping the rap element in the track, but fuse it with their own trademark bludgeon-everything-to-death hardcore onslaught and that weird squealing guitar noise at the end of every riff. I’m not sure if it’s vocalist Dave Peters from Throwdown doing the rapping, but it’s definitely him screaming throaty tirades of fury on the track’s title and on ‘LITTLE IN THE MIDDLE, BUT SHE GOT MUCH BACK!’

Yeah baby, when it comes to rapcore, Limp Bizkit has got nothin’ on this.

-

The Number 12 Looks Like You - My Sharona (original by The Knack)

In many respects, The Number 12 Looks Like You stick rigidly to the formula set out by the original (well, in the first 20 seconds) until the dual-vocal attack of Jesse Korman and Justin Pedrick kick in. What then follows is an attempt to out-shout each other (and add an impressive number of “woos!”) over the tight metal attack and solid sounding drumming. They certainly do the track justice, with the guitar solo at the 2 minute mark practically spot on. Whilst it’s as not as original as Polysics’ robotic-mash up of electro-pop bizarreness, The Number 12 do a good job.

-

The Blood Brothers - Under Pressure (original by Queen)

Taken from the ‘Dynamite With A Laserbeam‘ Three One G Queen tribute album, Seattle’s Blood Brothers transform Queen’s pop-gem into a raging fireball of aggressive punk rock. Jordan Blilie takes on the lead as Bowie, his trademark drawling scream adding tremendous weight to Johnny Whitney’s child-like shrieks of sassiness. During the “this is our last chance” segment, Blilie shows just how strong his voice can be, keeping the low crooning tone all the way through, whilst Whitney loses complete control in the background, giving the track a distinct hint of unhinged chaos - effectively making the song pure Blood Brothers. Infinitely better than My Chemical Romance’s version, which was just an embarrassment to music. Urgh.

-

Zombie Apocalypse - Welcome To The Jungle (original by Guns ‘n’ Roses)

Perhaps not the most subtle band in the world, Zombie Apocalypse seem to favour the ‘play fast, loud and screw what it sounds like’ attitude. Fair play guys. Any tune, dexterity, pure rock ‘n roll spirit that the original had has been destroyed by this rather meathead sounding cover. Whilst the intro sounds vaguely familiar, it’s soon lost under a wave of ridiculous over-zealous riffs and some rather unimpressive thrash metal. I suppose you have to admire their balls for covering this. What they lack in restraint and decency, they more than make up for in speed, rushing through the track in half the time that Guns ‘N’ Roses managed.

-

Sounds

Below is the little ol’ mixtape player for you to sample and make your own decisions about the four tracks. Stay tuned for more in the coming months!

Get the Flash Player to see the wordTube Media Player.

-

By Ross Macdonald

Band - Less Than Jake
Album - GNV FLA
Label - Sleep It Off Records/Cooking Vinyl
Release Date - last week I think
Sounds like -The glory days of 2001, playing Mario Kart/Goldeneye and not having a care in the world.
-

Leaving Warner Bros. records is possibly the 3rd best thing Less Than Jake have ever done. The first being writing an album as stunning as ‘Hello Rockview’ and the second their ‘biggest mosh pit ever’ at Reading in 2003 (I should know, I was there.) Finally free from the clutches of the money-grabbing, record-toning down corporate blow-hards, the ska-punk 5 piece are now able to release what they want, when they want on their own label: Sleep It Off Records. The result? ‘GNV FLA‘ a supposed return to glory days - but is it? Well, let’s see….

Let’s be straight about this, what I heard from ‘In With The Out Crowd‘ was pretty dire. (Hard words for me to say, as I’m a notorious LTJ fan) It was like a really fifth-rate pop-punk band ripping off Chris Demarkes vocals, whilst playing the most watered down mush ever created and passing it off under the glorious Less Than Jake name. Urgh. Thankfully, the Gainesville boys have got over this brief decent into madness and produced something that is more in line with their ‘Borders and Boundaries‘ work.

It’s a sombre, melodic start in the form of ‘City of Gainesville’; light-ska licks, coupled with a distinctly summery brass section and a slow drum beat. Then it suddenly erupts into a fury of punk rock splatter with ‘The State of Florida’ acting as the albums brief, but sprightly one-two punch. It’s the 3rd track where they really find their feet in the form of ‘Does The Lion City Still Roar?’ It’s classic ‘Jake – immensely danceable intro, a cracking chorus and an underlying beat that will capture the ears of fans of old with ease. Unlike their previous two albums, it seems as if trombonist Buddy and saxophonist J.R. have actually been given microphones to record their instruments into – the brass is increasingly prominent and a refreshing and welcomed return to their sound.

‘Summon Monsters’ sounds like a cut from ‘Hello Rockview’-era, whereas the fruitless-sounding nature of ‘Abandon Ship’ could possibly be directed at the band’s past attempt at stardom on Warner Records, especially in the line “treading water with weights around my neck, a shipwreck of restless accidents.” Perhaps even the line “Give me some forgiveness” could be directed towards those who gave their previous efforts a lukewarm/negative verdict.

What ‘GNV FLA’ seems to have that ‘Anthem’ really lacked is energy and a huge chunk of attitude. ‘Settling Son’ is an example of the terrific pace this album has. It also showcases the band telling the song’s protagonist to basically do something worthwhile with their life and even though it may seem like you’re in a precarious position; “walking the tight rope” it’s better to take the chance and make something of yourself rather than waste it going up in smoke, working in some shithouse factory.

Then again, the song could be about cigarettes.

The catchiest song ever for 2008 award goes to ‘Golden Age Of Negative Ways.’ Twee-handclaps, some outrageously parpy brass and lyrics that hark back to ‘Gainesville Rock City’ song-writing that slaps a huge grin on my face. ‘Conviction Notice’ focuses on financial troubles, with the lines “money can’t buy happiness” and “dollars and cents are not making sense” showing that despite the band’s exuberant, adrenalin rush of punk rock, they’re concerned about fiscal matters, or at least are willing to sing about it.

What sets this apart from other Less Than Jake albums is the way vocalists Chris and Roger compliment each other so well. This is quite possibly their strongest album vocally; both singers singing to an exceptionally high standard for melodic punk rock, with Chris’s gravely drawl sitting nicely next to Roger’s slightly higher-pitched and grimy shout. This is easily their best work since ‘Borders and Boundaries’ and dare I say, possibly better than the 2000 release itself. A fine return then from one of my favourite bands, definitely one for the fans to sink their teeth into and a great starting point for anyone interested in exploring their music to see what the fuss is about - a solid slice of punk rock, with enough ska to keep the die-hard fans waving their arms and shaking their feet until the end of time.

-

Sounds

Click on the player below to listen to ‘Golden Age Of Negative Ways.’

Get the Flash Player to see the wordTube Media Player.

-

Links

Less Than Jake
Less Than Myspace
Sleep It Off Records
Cooking Vinyl

-

By Ross Macdonald

Band - Arnocorps
Support - Thirteen Wolves, Dagobah
Venue - Dublin Castle (should be re-christened ‘The Dublin Living Room’ - it’s tiny)
Beer - niceessshhh
Cost - Tenner

-

Considering I’d been waiting for this for a good 2 years, I wasn’t actually that excited until I got to the venue and attempted a mid-air handshake/arm wrestle with Holzfeuer (lead singer of Arnocorps) - fucking win. They must be the nicest band ever. I swear to god, they spent most of their rehearsal time talking to fans, shouting the words “GOOOOOOO!” getting photos taken, calling people “godamn heroes!” and drinking. Anyway…THE GIG:

-

I caught the tail-end of Dagobah’s set, which was unfortunate as they sounded pretty good. A Skate-punk, thrashfest that I wouldn’t have minded hearing more of in the future. Unfortunately the next support band, Thirteen Wolves, I could have done without. It was a bit like watching that ‘band’ who cover all the songs on Guitar Hero. Except it wasn’t like Guitar Hero where you fuck-up the ‘Sweet Child Of Mine’ solo, turn the console off and play Gears of War instead - you carry on, trying vainly to keep in time before your fingers fall off and you end up planting the over-sized controller in the tv screen. I’ve never been so bored in my entire life at a gig (well, save for watching The Kits or this awful death metal band I had to endure at Esquires once. *Shudders*) It was a cock-rock horrorshow that I could have done without really - so bad in fact my friend tried to fit her fist in her mouth at the title of one of their tracks, which I think was some garbled nonsense about a wizard. Normally, comedy-Warhammer-lite shenanigans would be up my street, but really….no…..just no. Plus, they kept pronouncing Arnocorps wrong. (’Arno-core’ for those uninitiated) There was a big cheer from the back of the room when they announced their last song - thank fuck. Possibly the worst band I’ve seen this year.

-

As the opening bars to Little Richard’s ‘Long Tall Sally’ kicked in, a great cheer rose up from the audience, proving that 1950’s rock ‘n’ roll is still popular with the kids (considering it was featured in the opening scenes of sci-fi action horror Predator.) As the closing bars tell us to “have some fun tonight,” the band everyone has been waiting for troop on to the stage - Arnocorps are here.

Sadly, it’s a disappointing start. What should have been a glorious action adventure rock ‘n’ roll fest was hampered by the terrible attitude of some over-zealous fanboys who’d probably had one too many beerskis and had been watching tales of heroic action the previous night. Get the fuck off the stage you epic twunts and let the band play. Do you actually think I want to see you hurling your sweaty forms into the crowd, possibly braining me with your oversized feet as you thrash about like an epileptic on fire? No, I don’t. Suffice to say, ‘Predator’ was nearly ruined due to this, however it’s kept together by vocalist Holzfeuer’s display of crowd safety and terrific showmanship in keeping things in check. I probably sound like a miserable old bastard for saying this really. I know you should have fun at a show, but really there should be a line drawn between ‘having a laugh’ and ‘being a world-class cockend.’ I have to say though, the sight of everyone singing back the lines “what happened Dillon? You used to be someone, I could trust? TRUST!” was particularly heart-warming.

Some may say that Arnocorps are a slight one-trick pony. Sure, most of their songs follow along the similar pattern, but what they lack in variety they make up for in volume and on-stage banter, spliced with their film-heavy lyrics and reckless attitude. They plow through their most well known songs to start wit. ‘Terminator’ is greeted with rapturous applause; the steady drum and bass build up erupts into the well known chant of “Nice night, for a walk? Nothing, clean right?” Soon all decorum is lost as the Dublin Castle turns into a whirlwind frenzy of air-punches and Schwarzenegger quotes. ‘Commando’ goes down well with Holzfeuer asking the audience what they had for breakfast (the answer is always ‘Green Berets’.) ‘Collateral Damage’ is run through flawlessly and is possibly my favourite track of the whole evening – pure, adrenalin filled punk rock with a sooth-as-silk bassline and a terrific vocal chant at the end.

“Only sing this song if you believe it about yourself” Holzfeuer says. He shouldn’t be worried though, everyone in the room is hanging off his every word and the cry of “I’m Ballsy! I’m a stud! I don’t take shit from everyone!” is echoed back at the giant Florida/Austrian with gusto. “This is a goddamn, anthem of our generation” he bellows and there’s no disagreeing with him, or the band on that one. During ‘True Lies’ they pull several troops on to the stage to act as the ‘Arno-chorus’, an act that is later repeated during the ‘this song will never end’ saga of ‘Running Man’(everyone and I mean everyone, is encouraged to run on the spot), which had bassist Toten Adler crowd surfing on a guitar case – a prospect that was both amazing and slightly worrying at the same time, especially his near head-plant from the make-shift surfboard. Once again though, several chumps ruin certain moments by yelling incomprehensibly down the microphone, only to be ejected from the stage by the man-mountain of singer. At this point, the stage invasion is getting incredibly tiresome, but the band battle on with a rousing rendition of ‘End of Days’, possibly dedicated to all the choir boys and to all the goddamn heroes out there, ‘Last Action Hero’ delivers the upper-cut of uniting everyone in a frenzy of bonding, unity and brotherhood under the Arnocorps banner of valour and bravery.

Other set pieces, aside from chucking people off the stage include drummer Gellend Adler’s drum solo and wet t-shit competition (he’s undefeated, even again the rather striking young lady who took up the courage to challenge the power-house stickman.) They even manage to run through several new tracks (‘Kindergarten Cop’, ‘Red Heat’ and another about us Brits that I can’t remember the name of, but damn it was mighty fine.) The ending though, is disappointing. Instead of a thrilling version of ‘Total Recall’ they play ‘Eraser’ perhaps the weakest track on the album. Promising to “mix up their set” for the rest of their tour, Arnocorps exit, from what has been a night full of mixed emotions – some good, some bad but on the whole, ballsy to the max.

-

Links

Arnocorps
Arno-Myspace
Anticulture

-

Words - Ross Macdonald
Photos - Jason Kahl

Apologies again for the delay in new posts. I’m actually supposed to be making a forum for a friend at the moment and it’s been slow work, but I’m hopefully on course now, so I can concentrate on posting on Keep It Fast (he says!) Anyway, here’s another Sound Check review for you to enjoy/endure.

-

Alkaline Trio - In Vein

This is Alkaline Trio? Great Scott Marty, I’d have called you a lying bastard if I hadn’t read the back of the CD and seen their name glaring out at me. Containing almost none of the edge, catchiness or hint of emotion that their older songs had, this is a poor attempt reviving their gothic-lite punk career. The chorus isn’t bad though, but really they can do much better than this.
-

All Time Low - Dear Maria, Count Me In

Ah pop-punk. It’s like that friend at school who you were always embarrassed to hang around with because they were so wet, yet were so ridiculously happy, they’d probably ask you to beat them up just to make you look good. All Time Low are like that. Pretty standard affair, no-surprises, no-frills radio friendly pop-punk that bounces along like a truck full of springs going over a cliff.

-

Less Than Jake - Summon Monsters

From the rumbling bass and rapid-fire drums, I knew that Gainesville punks Less Than Jake were finally back to sounding like they did 7 years ago, circa their ‘Borders & Boundaries’ era horns-a-plenty parpfest. The brass is still slightly repressed, (think Rocket From The Crypt rather than Reel Big Fish) but the five-piece still know how to write a tremendously vibrant slice of summer-ska punk, with a chorus so crammed full of hooks you’d think they were taking it fishing. (Stay tuned for album review soon.)
-

Former Cell Mates - Always
Former Cell Mates obviously listen to a lot of Hot Water Music. In fact, I swore this was a track by the Gainesville 4 piece at one point. This teeters on the edge of Latterman territory, but not as fast and with less gravel-like vocals. It’s a pleasant enough tune, but hardly original really. Yet more post-hardcore fodder methinks, although the guitar solo at the 2 minute mark is particularly fine.
-

Secondsmile - Everything And All That’s Inbetween

Yet more tappy, twiddling rock music from Big Scary Monsters. Being familiar with Secondsmile’s music, I was always slightly let down by their sound, which always seemed a bit flat. This is the polar opposite however: the guitars screech and whine under the strong tribal drumbeats and the vocals punctuate through the howl impressively. Fine work from a promising band who are about to release their second album.

-

The Legacy - Fire And Brimstone

I like this. It dips somewhere between the abrasive, throaty hardcore of Give Up The Ghost and stark stand-offish nature of Cursed, with the band’s own touch of raspy vocals and distorted fuzz beneath the build up of anvil-like drumwork. Worth checking out.

-

Melvins - The Smiling Cobra

Having only heard a few tracks by Washington’s Melvins, I’m kicking myself for not listening to them sooner. This can only be described as fucking amazing. The guitar roars and wails as though it’s been de-tuned and re-tuned at the same time, whilst the duel drums pulverise any subtly this track has into dust under a haze of some monstrous bass riffs and terrifying screams. Sludge/noise/rock whatever you want to call it, it’s pretty special.

-

Cult of Luna - Curse

The slow build up of dread means it can only be one thing. Super Hans has finally got a record deal, or Cult of Luna are on this CD. Thankfully it’s the Swedes and they make short work of my hearing by bludgeoning it with their soundscape of orchestral metal that hums and reverberates with a furious cacophony and vocals that could strip paint – a savage beast of a track and no mistake!

-

Valient Thorr - Infinite Lives

Valient Thorr are one of those ‘hilarious’ bands that has a wacky back story. In this case, they landed their spaceship in North Carolina in 1957. Really. Despite this somewhat ludicrous tale (see more on their wikipedia page) their sound isn’t bad, reminiscent slightly of a 21st Century Van Halen. I could see them getting slightly tiresome after a while though. There probably really ‘wacky’ live as well. Oh god no.

-

Keith Caputo - Troubles Down

Along with Fu Manchu, this is possibly the perfect song to listen to whilst roaring down some dusty road in a souped-up Cadillac in a backwash corner of America. Don’t expect stoner-rock though, this lifts straight from the Velvet Revolver school of huge riffs, drawling vocals and a cool-as-fuck attitude.

-

D-Rail - Tonight…We Party!!!

A predictable start, which only makes me look at the screen and check the running time. Two minutes? Yeah, I can hack that. D-Rail have already suckered me in by playing their hand early in the form of the gang-chant vocals that I love so much. Apart from that, standard hardcore affair that’s been done so many times before; it’s like looking at a painting done entirely in beige.

-

Nachtmystium - Your True Enemy

‘Nachtmystium’ sounds like a spell from the Undead Warhammer magic card pack. You have no idea what I’m on about do you? Even the bassist is called Jon Necromancer! Plus, from the photo I’ve seen they all look like reanimated corpses. Oh yeah, the music. Think black metal, think really fast, think drums going “dugga dugga dug dug” and think about how monotonous that all sounds. Bleh.

-

Ascend - Ample Fire Within

As someone left their guitar too close to a speaker? Oh right, it IS music, gotcha. Only joking. This is actually pretty good, for something that I thought was going to rip off Cult of Luna, instead decides to scare the crap out of me by sounding similar to the music on the last level of Doom 2, but with more terror. Chanting over the top of SunnO))) inspired feedback, coupled with some seriously distorted bass? Hell yeah. Great track and superb band name as well.

-

Errors - National Prism
I think I’ve seen these guys live. They were supporting Rolo Tomassi with another band that were absolute pony. One of them had really crappy disco drums that every vaguely pop/electro band has. Thankfully, it’s not Errors, who actually sound like the diet coke version of Battles, only slightly less interesting. Big barrel of ‘meh’ right there.
-

The Ascent of Everest - Mountains

The Ascent of Everest could not have a more apt band name. Their music is a grand, all-encompassing pillar of post-rock that should be back-tracking some slow motion battle sequence in a film and not on a CD being reviewed by a socially inept Games Workshop fan. I’m a sucker for these kind of things, even though I bitch about listening to anything over 10 minutes long, I can’t help but love it sometimes. (Lovely violin bit at the end as well.)

-

Links

See above, I’m off to try and make something listenable from the horrendous fuzz I recorded a few weeks ago.

-

By Ross Macdonald